The Table as an Art of Living: French Dining Philosophy

There is a saying in France that a meal is not mere nourishment but an art of living. The French treasure long, relaxed meals with family and friends, and treat fine food as both a culture and a philosophy. In 2010, French traditional dining etiquette was even inscribed on UNESCO's Intangible Cultural Heritage list. A traditional meal begins with an aperitif, moves through a starter, a main course, cheese and dessert (at least four courses), and ends with a digestif. Savoring the food, talking slowly, and feeling the bond with the people around you: that is the heart of the French approach to eating.

In practice, though, the French actually eat fairly quickly. They tend to finish the food fast and spend far more time talking.

Today, few people follow the full sequence every time. Multi-course meals are mostly reserved for important family occasions. At restaurants, many diners order just a main, and at home a single plate is increasingly the norm. Restaurants commonly sell set menus that pair a starter with a main, or a main with a dessert.

Breakfast is very simple: a hot coffee and a croissant, or a baguette with jam or butter. Many people now skip it altogether, while children always have a cup of hot chocolate (chocolat chaud).

Lunch, for students and office workers these days, is often a quick salad or pasta. Traditionally, though, it was the most important meal of the day, and on weekends people may linger over lunch for two to three hours or more. In Catholic France, families gathered for a long meal after Sunday Mass, which reinforced the idea that eating should never be rushed. Dinner is lighter than lunch and usually eaten at home with family, with plenty of time set aside for conversation.

Table manners matter a great deal, and they rest on respect for the people you are dining with. Before eating, diners exchange a "Bon appétit." Keep both hands resting on the table without propping your elbows on it, and eat gracefully with a fork in one hand and a knife in the other. Large salad leaves are folded with the fork rather than cut, and even pizza and sandwiches are ideally eaten with a knife and fork. When you finish, lay your knife and fork side by side on the plate. Travelers are free to eat however they like, but resting your elbows on the table is something French children are reliably scolded for by their parents. Even these small details express consideration for others and respect for the food.

Why is French dining so slow? First, there is a culture of savoring food; French cuisine is delicate and best appreciated slowly. Conversation is also central, and when family or friends get together, the talk simply keeps going. Add the habit of letting food cool slightly before eating, and a culture in which diners enjoy their meal at their own pace without worrying about the next customer, and you get meals that are long and unhurried.